- Okay. I'm going to go ahead and say it. What the heck was Arnold Schwarzenegger thinking? I know it's not uncommon for famous men to cheat-- and even have kids out of wedlock. But the housekeeper? No one is shocked that Arnie was a scumbag. I think we're all just a little shocked he has such bad taste. Damn.
- So, it's late Sunday and it appears that the Rapture didn't occur on Saturday. Which is awesome because "Game of Thrones" is on tonight.
- Speaking of "Game of Thrones...." I always watch shows like that and wonder if that much nudity is a good stepping stone in an acting career. What do the auditions look like when they try to get their next role? See, I'm really good at doing on-camera sex faces. You'll really think I'm doing the nasty! Oh, the part is for a schoolteacher? Is it a nasty schoolteacher?
- I'm not really interested in seeing the latest "Pirates of the Caribbean" movie. I've already seen about 8 hours worth of Johnny Depp doing his swishy Keith Richards impersonation, so I think I've got the premise. I don't know that adding mermaids is going to make it seem like a whole new experience.
- When I see the term "geek chic" I wonder who actually thinks it's fashionable to be geeky. Are there really people out there trying to dress like Bill Gates? Or are we talking about pseudo geeks who think they're being edgy by wearing plastic eyeglass frames and striped scarves? Because no one I know thinks I'm particularly chic, nor are they rushing to throw up a sci-fi blog.
- Does anyone really learn a foreign language by listening to it on your MP3 player? I lived in Japan for four months (with a Japanese family!) and I'm pretty sure they were talking about me the whole time-- but who can for sure because I barely understood a word they said even after two years of language courses. My language skills were obviously not that good but I seriously doubt listening to the whole Rosetta Stone library would have made me more fluent than I was.
- I love watching cooking shows and often think that it would be really awesome to be a guest judge on Iron Chef. But with my luck I'd be there on the night that brussel sprouts was the featured ingredient.
- Is there a more quotable movie than The Jerk? My husband just turned it on and I'm having a really hard time writing this because I keep stopping to hear what Steve Martin is going to say next. So I'm going to leave you with a few quotes:
Navin R. Johnson: Huh? I am *not* a bum. I'm a jerk. I once had wealth, power, and the love of a beautiful woman. Now I only have two things: my friends, and... uh... my thermos. Huh? My story? Okay. It was never easy for me. I was born a poor black child. I remember the days, sittin' on the porch with my family, singin' and dancin' down in Mississippi...
Mother: Navin, it's your birthday, and it's time you knew. You're not our natural-born child.
Navin R. Johnson: I'm not? You mean I'm gonna STAY this color?
[a sniper keeps missing Navin and hitting cans of motor oil]
Navin R. Johnson: He hates these cans! Stay away from the cans!
Navin R. Johnson: I know we've only known each other four weeks and three days, but to me it seems like nine weeks and five days. The first day seemed like a week and the second day seemed like five days. And the third day seemed like a week again and the fourth day seemed like eight days. And the fifth day you went to see your mother and that seemed just like a day, and then you came back and later on the sixth day, in the evening, when we saw each other, that started seeming like two days, so in the evening it seemed like two days spilling over into the next day and that started seeming like four days, so at the end of the sixth day on into the seventh day, it seemed like a total of five days. And the sixth day seemed like a week and a half. I have it written down, but I can show it to you tomorrow if you want to see it.
[Stan Fox's eyeglasses keep slipping off]
Stan Fox: Damn these glasses son.
Navin R. Johnson: Yes, sir.
[to the glasses]
Navin R. Johnson: I damn thee.
Navin R. Johnson: You have great skin. Are you a model?
Marie: No. I'm a Cosmetologist.
Navin R. Johnson: A Cosmetologist? Really? Wow. Must be tough to handle the weightlessness.