Sunday, December 23, 2007
--One more Christmas post...... George Bailey: What is it you want, Mary? What do you want? You want the moon? Just say the word and I'll throw a lasso around it and pull it down. Hey. That's a pretty good idea. I'll give you the moon, Mary. Mary: I'll take it. Then what? George Bailey: Well, then you can swallow it, and it'll all dissolve, see... and the moonbeams would shoot out of your fingers and your toes and the ends of your hair... am I talking too much? ~It's a Wonderful Life Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Over the years I got to be quite a connoisseur of soap. Though my personal preference was for Lux, I found that Palmolive had a nice, piquant after-dinner flavor - heavy, but with a touch of mellow smoothness. Life Buoy, on the other hand... YECCHH! ~A Christmas Story Fred Holywell: [on his Uncle Ebenezer] ... His wealth is quite useless to him, really. He doesn't do any good with it; he doesn't even make HIMSELF comfortable with it. Ebenezer Scrooge: [whom nobody else can see or hear] I haven't SQUANDERED it, if that's what you mean by "making myself comfortable!" Ghost of Christmas Present: You mustn't argue with those in the right. It's pointless, and even tactless. Ebenezer Scrooge: Tact is a quality I despise. Ghost of Christmas Present: *That* I can see. ~A Christmas Carol Frank Cross: I want to see her nipples. Censor Lady: But this is a CHRISTMAS show. Frank Cross: Well, I'm sure Charles Dickens would have wanted to see her nipples. Guy who works on set: You can barely see them nipples. Frank Cross: See? And these guys are REALLY looking. ~Scrooged Kevin McCallister: I took a shower washing every body part with actual soap; including all my major crevices; including in between my toes and in my belly button which I never did before but sort of enjoyed. I washed my hair with adult formula shampoo and used cream rinse for that just-washed shine. I can't seem to find my toothbrush, so I'll pick one up when I go out today. Other than that, I'm in good shape. ~Home Alone Clark Griswold: Where do you think you're going? Nobody's leaving. Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We're all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here. We're gonna press on, and we're gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny fucking Kaye. And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse. ~Christmas Vacation Santa: That's another thing... Buddy you should know that your father... he's on the naughty list. Buddy: Nooooo! ~Elf John McClane: Merry Christmas, Argyle. Argyle: Merry Christmas. Argyle: [Argyle shuts the limo door] Argyle: Man, if this is their idea of Christmas, I *gotta* be here for New Year's. ~Die Hard (Yippie-kay-yay, motherfucker is really my favorite, but I was trying for a holiday quote.... ) Have a great holiday everyone!